Review of Two Fat Ladies: The Complete Series

Introduction

Why me? That was the first question I asked when this disc arrived for review. Not that I have anything against the touring cooks, or cookery programmes in general, it`s just that I`m… well, fickle. I hate people who say, "I`m a vegetarian, except for fish, and chicken, and the occasional lamb chop", but that`s me down to a tee. So it`s more accurate, and efficient to just say that I`m fickle. As far back as I can remember I`ve been watching my weight… increase. And so it is to stay healthy, I stick to the vegetables and the lentils, keeping the meaty treats for special occasions. Even then, they are prepared in as healthy a way as possible, extra virgin olive oil, George Formby`s lean mean grilling machine, or just used as a garnish. Just watching TV chefs and cooks using dollops of butter, whippings of lashed cream, and gallons of rum in their recipes is enough to make my heart valves send up a white flag. I have a brief memory of tuning in to the Two Fat Ladies once (modern television`s predilection for insulting programme titles continues unabated ten years later), and my lasting impression, accurate or otherwise, was of fried cholesterol, marinated in lard, with an Exxon Valdez dressing. Anyway, I take my heart in my hands (to keep it beating), keep a stick or two of celery nearby in case of emergencies, and pop the disc in for a large helping of the Two Fat Ladies.

The Two Fat Ladies were Jennifer Paterson and Clarissa Dickson Wright, who with their motorcycle sidecar combination toured Britain to show us some real, good old fashioned un-PC cooking, just the way grandmother used to make. The freshest ingredients would be obtained locally, and in amidst all the banter and jollity, some culinary creations would arise that would look gorgeous. Each week would be a different place and a different theme, whether it was Fish, Meat, Game or even contrary to my recollections, Fruit and Vegetables. Places would vary, from Westminster Cathedral, to a girl`s boarding school, or even at a scout camp.

Over ten years has passed since the Two Fat Ladies were on our screens, and belatedly for the anniversary, the complete series has been released on four discs along with some extras. As it is, I have only received disc 1 for review, and that is a temperamental dual layer DVD-R. Since it is a dual layer disc, I`m assuming that the quality of the programme can`t improve, so I`ll dish out some technical scores, but it should still be borne in mind that this isn`t the final product, and the specifications could change before release.

Video

I`m a little uncertain of the 4:3 aspect ratio. Two Fat Ladies came from that period in the BBC`s history when programmes were rapidly going widescreen. There`s no evidence of cropping in the episodes shown here, but the tribute in the extras has bits lopped off the sides. If the later series were shot in widescreen, then they too will be cropped. Not having received the discs, I can`t be certain though. There`s close to three and a half hours of footage on this disc, and the image is prone to compression. It`s not the sort of show where it makes that much difference frankly.

Audio

The DD 2.0 English track is clear as is the dialogue, which is just what the doctor ordered. Unfortunately, he also ordered subtitles, which have been lost in transit.

Features

There is a one-minute slideshow picture gallery, as well as a few pages of text biographies for Jennifer Paterson and Clarissa Dickson Wright.

Jennifer Paterson passed away in 1999, and the subsequent tribute programme is also presented here. Lasting 40 minutes, it offers plenty of opportunity for friends, family and fans to honour her. It also covers her life story, which was certainly richer than most.

Conclusion

I`m no gastronaut, and I certainly won`t boldly eat what no man has eaten before, but in the six programmes that I`ve seen on this disc, the Two Fat Ladies offer strange new foods, and new taste sensations. It`s rich, luxurious fare, which I know for certain I can`t eat. I can`t afford to pay for what it`ll do to my arteries. But the food they create is absolutely mouth-watering and divine. I can almost believe that there is a point to lard.

But the Two Fat Ladies is more a lifestyle programme than a cookery clinic. This is a far cry from the modern cookery programmes, where every little thing is spelt out for you. If you come here looking to learn recipes, then it`s the wrong place. If on the other hand you are a competent cook looking for ideas, then this show is perfect. What is refreshing is the un-PC attitude. This show, long before Hugh Fernleaf Marketstall, actually showed you where food came from. Fish, fresh from the ocean, would be gutted and cleaned before being cooked. Before cooking some beef, they would go and meet one of the poor cow`s relatives to see what meat looks like before it is meat.

Even better is the banter. The two cooks` friendship comes across strongly on screen, and there is as much reason to watch the show to see them chat, as it is to see what they cook. It`s a very charming, and rustic atmosphere they created, and watching these programmes, I felt I was partaking of the Wind In The Willows. They have something of Toad`s lunatic enthusiasm, Ratty`s amiability, and Badger`s gruff eccentricity. The Two Fat Ladies were comfort food for the eyes, and while the food they created would have cholesterol meters screaming in alarm, the show itself is healthy nourishment indeed. Well worth hopping on a motorcycle down memory lane for.