Review of Dead Meat

Introduction

`Mad cows`, I hear them say. Well in this film the cows are bloody irate. The Irish Film Board invest in the first genuine homegrown horror movie, zombies come to the Emerald Isle and no one is safe from the menace of mutated BSE. The cows are getting their revenge for being fed recycled meat products.

It all begins when a hapless farmer is mauled to death by a mad cow one moonlit night. Not long after, a young couple are driving in the country, when someone appears in the road long enough to be squelchily dispatched under the wheels of their Saab. The nightmare for Martin and Helena is just beginning though. The pedestrian`s corpse comes back to life to take a chunk out of Martin`s neck. Bleeding, Martin sends Helena to a nearby cottage to get help, but the cottage is filled with death. While Helena searches the cottage, a ravenous undead beast has followed her. Martin is now a zombie, and wishes to chow down on his former love. Helena uses her wits and a vacuum cleaner, and barely escapes with her life. Fortunately for her, a local gravedigger named Desmond discovers her, and he explains the horde of zombies wandering the Irish countryside. They`ll have to keep their wits about them to stay alive, even with the assistance of a passing hurling coach and his odd wife, as well as Desmond`s unique skill with a shovel.

Video

Digital video is a godsend for the low budget filmmaker, and Dead Meat is another fine example of the clarity of image available nowadays. Given its horror genre, Dead Meat is a film that takes place mostly in dark and indistinct locations, and more often than not, scenes are lit with natural light. Still the 1.85: 1 anamorphic image remains clear and strong through much of the film, objects have good definition, and when there is a sufficient light source, the picture can be impressive. The farmer`s moonlight stroll into death at the start of the film is a good case in point. However the resolution of the digital source varies in the film, with some scenes sharper than others, and first time director Colin McMahon is enthusiastic with his choice of shots, with some early extreme close-ups looking very Blair Witch-esque. As the film progresses (shot in sequence) he begins to find a style, but it does take a while.

Audio

You have a choice between DD 2.0 Stereo and DD 5.1 Surround. The dialogue is clear enough, though the regional dialects may prove problematic for some. The surround is pretty front-focussed, but there is a good deal of ambience, with plenty of nature sounds spread around the speakers, along with the spooky music. There is also some juicy eating FX when the zombies are dining on a victim. I wish there had been subtitles though, as some of the regional dialects were hard to fathom, and one character in particular, the hurling coach, had an accent that I found absolutely incomprehensible. It didn`t stop him from being the best character in the film though.

Features

Dead Meat comes with some savoury extras, all packaged with some nicely animated menus. There is the usual trailer of course, as well as 10 production stills in a gallery.

Director Conor McMahon and producers Edward King and Michael Griffin talk about Ireland`s first horror flick in an interesting audio commentary. The comments are always relevant, and the three speakers seem to enjoy talking about their masterpiece.

Mad Cows And Zombies is the making of documentary. Lasting 19 minutes, it takes a look behind the scenes at the shoot, the cast and crew interject the occasional comment and it all ends at the world premiere.

Finally Braineater is Conor McMahon`s graduation piece. At 10 minutes it offers some more Zombie mayhem, with an early introduction to the colourful hurling coach.

Conclusion

I want to like zombie films, I really do. With the resurgence of the genre, and the recent reinvention in Shaun of the Dead, I feel like I`m missing out on the good times. I can`t help it though; I find the lurching undead monstrosities a source of never ending tedium, a waste of celluloid, repetitive, formulaic drudge. There is supposed to be something psychological and symbolic about the whole idea, man devouring himself and all that, but it goes straight over my head into the bargain bin. Having said that, Dead Meat is probably the closest I have come to enjoying a zombie flick.

The idea of mutated BSE ravaging the human species with a zombie-creating virus is almost delightful, and the lush countryside of Ireland is the oddest place to have a zombie infestation that I can think of. Irish zombies, it has a surreal Father Ted feel to it, you`d think Jack would be their king. Like all budget horror flicks, it has that rough and ready acting and cheap and cheerful effects that many people would look for in such a film. The dialogue is cheesy to the point of charming, and there is a wonderful homage to Jurassic Park, where a cow gets delusions of T-Rex-hood. I have it on good authority (the commentary) that there are other references in the film, but you`ll have to be a fan of the Zombie genre to recognise them. The character of Cathal, the incomprehensible Hurling coach steals this film. His blather and outrageous personality is unmissable, and despite the fact that I only caught one word in twenty of his drone, he still made more sense than many of the other characters in the film.

Does the world need another Zombie movie? Probably not, but Dead Meat certainly doesn`t do the genre any harm. It`s silly, it`s fun and it`s not overlong. It`s also the closest I have ever come to enjoying a zombie film, and that is the highest endorsement, pathetic though it is, that I can give it. If you are a fan of the genre, you probably want to see this. Once was enough for me though.